Excerpt from one of the blog entries:
Dutch people don’t mince words. You certainly won’t find them biting their tongues, dying for the courage to finally speak freely. Don’t feel like hearing from your co-worker that she actually doesn’t think your new haircut is all that nice. Too bad. Don’t want to know that the speech you made and worried might have sucked, did in fact, suck, big time. Get used to it. In the Netherlands you are likely going to hear a lot of statements, that in other cultures politely fall into the category of “better left unsaid”.
Say what?
My opinionatedness has gotten me into plenty of trouble, and not just online, I'm talking about IRL (in real life-- for those people who say "no one would ever say that to a person IRL to their face....well, actually, I would say exactly that to their face... in real life to their face, because I'm Dutch, and I do value honesty as the best policy).
I do not go out of my way to try to be rude or mean to irritate people out of a desire to be aggressive or obnoxious, or what have you. I behave courtiously and when I do get into scrapes regarding my honesty, the Lord always comes to my rescue, and the situation always resolves itself into such a manner that the other "guilty" party admits that I didn't say anything "wrong". This had me bewildered for a long time and then my sweet husband shared this funny website with me, and it cleared up much of my bewilderment.
I thank the Lord for honesty, regardless of how it is perceived or accepted/rejected.
My husband's aunt is Dutch and she is just like this. I love her to pieces because you know exactly where you stand with her.
ReplyDeleteI value honesty and being straight to the point. I am always cautious when someone beats around the bush, I wonder what they plan to slip in while they have my mind in a spin.
Truth and honesty dressed with class are great qualities to have. I guess that is one of the reasons why I like you.
Blessings.
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I'm still learning to not mind the reactions, to learn to observe reactions and have them teach me the things that the Lord needs me to understand from what these situations teach me, instead of reacting back. The words people say (or don't say) says a lot about them. God already knows this about each one of us, but we learn from each others words, reactions, and deeds...however we do not yet understand the well from which these spring forth from. Jesus does.
DeleteThe Apostle Paul was good at debate, reaching people where this were at in order to not shut down the open conversation, as in the statue of the unknown God, but when it came to being politically correct at the expense of the Lord, he drew a line and did not keep His mouth shut. Its good to speak your mind, but check where your mind is at and why. What do you believe and where did you come by that belief? This side of heaven, you cannot keep from offending someone. The real question is: "Are you offending God?" Talk is good ... very good, that's what is great about this blog of yours. We can discuss these things open and honestly among each other. It may be the Dutch way, but God thought of it first. Keep the lively and opinion-fueled debates going.
ReplyDeleteHi Brian,
DeleteIt is good if the truth offends, because Jesus said that it would...we are not to be offensive for the sake of being offensive, however when we speak of what Jesus said, we offend many for the sake of the truth. I had a really hard time with this, although I understood this (somewhat) I still struggled with the aspect of "If I present it lovingly...or correctly....or if it is the Holy Spirit guiding my words" it would then be accepted wholeheartedly. However, that is not the case.
If everyone loves me and what I have to say, it makes me pause to make sure I really am speaking what God says in His word because His word offends the flesh.
Thank you Brian for visiting, and your gracefully expressed thoughts. If they did what they did to Jesus for speaking the truth in love, how much more can they do to us?
Btw, sometimes the Dutch people are offensive for the sake of being offensive, but more often than not, they truly are just being completely forthright in expressing their honest opinion...and often they don't care if you disagree with them or are angered by their opinion. That last portion I need more of, the not caring if people are offended by the truth of God's word. That is truly the position Jesus took, and the position the apostles took. :)
DeleteMaybe I'm missing it, but what's the website you're referencing?
ReplyDeleteHi Kristin it's hyperlinked...if you click on it (the words "a website") in first sentence it will take you directly to it. Thanks for visiting...I wonder if many others missed it as well???
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