Dream (Earlier this morning)

 I've been looking at many of the news reports and the things that are happening in this world, and early this morning just before waking I had a very vivid dream.

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I do not remember the exact details of the dream except that it was chaotic and very unsettling, much fighting, unrest, people rioting, running, and my own thoughts and feelings while in this dream were unsettled and chaotic, I was completely in it, part of the problems, terrified, not wanting these things to happen but helpless to stop it. I awoke for a moment, my thoughts turned to Jesus "Help me to know what to do" was my inward prayer, and then went back to sleep. I returned to that scene in the dream and again I saw the chaos and fighting, but was being drawn up from it, sensing that those whose hearts were of this world would destroy themselves and each other taking each other down, but those who are of the Lord will be lifted up, not part of the mess, and it then turned my thoughts to death and resurrection and the different experience that will be had by those who die loving this world more than God and those who die and are truly looking to God, Jesus, our all in all. In the dream it felt like angels were pulling me up and keeping me standing, and  it might be that I died in the dream at that point and was being lifted off the earth. It seemed like the images of "the rapture" in a way, yet not really that, almost that.



It again reminded me that we who are in Christ are "in the world but not of the world", and that when we are absent from the body (when we physically die) we will be present with the Lord. Very comforting thoughts while seeing all of the world's chaotic problems.

John 16:32-33 (ESV)  Behold, the hour cometh, yea, is now come, that ye shall be scattered, every man to his own, and shall leave me alone: and yet I am not alone, because the Father is with me.  These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.

Harbouring Unforgiveness in My Heart

 Taking a little break from the Calvinist study to share something from my daily life...

 

"Cell Division" by Seliora

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This Morning's Dream:

Interacting with many people in the hustle bustle of daily life, but I was noticing a change. People were becoming "more of what they are", like their inner lives were coming out into the open more and more, many seemed to be losing their minds. A few, like me, seemed to be outside of this transforming development. We were the truly thankful ones who had forgiven those who had hurt us in the past. The others that were changing ....became, or rather allowed themselves the freedom to exhibit their hatefilled self-centeredness, anger and their coldness. They still had a huge amount of anger, rage, and unforgiveness in them. Some didn't seem as bad, they still seemed to have a form of "goodness" but were quietly seething on the inside while appearing very haughty and still putting up an appearance of what looked like love, but it was only love for themselves and those they approved of. I tried to reach out to a man who seemed to be struggling in the middle. I told him to let go of all unforgiveness in his heart, to be truly thankful to God for the good things, for life. He looked at me and understood.

When I awoke from this dream this morning, I felt as though this world is like a cell in the process of cell division with the Lord's people on one side and the rest on the other, getting separated out, like the tares from the wheat, I didn't feel anxious or panicked about it, just very thoughtful, thinking over Jesus words about the unforgiveness and hatred I was seeing displayed in those who were not His:

 Matthew 18:23-35  "Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to be made. 

 So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, 'Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.'  

And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt.  But when that same servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii, and seizing him, he began to choke him, saying, 'Pay what you owe.'  So his fellow servant fell down and pleaded with him, 'Have patience with me, and I will pay you.'  

He refused and went and put him in prison until he should pay the debt.  

When his fellow servants saw what had taken place, they were greatly distressed, and they went and reported to their master all that had taken place.  

Then his master summoned him and said to him, 'You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me.  And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you?' And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt.  So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart."(ESV)

 Matthew 6:15  but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. (ESV)

There are a couple of people that come to mind that I have never fully resolved an irritating issue between us, still harboring anger towards them, but keep  "it" in a hidden part of my being, so others won't notice it, and once in a while, that monster pops it's ugly head out and I shove him back into the dark corner where no one will notice him. He is a part of my flesh, and am thankful for this (above) parable.  I have given this problem to the Lord and He will do the delicate surgery required to heal everything in His time....but that doesn't let me completely off the hook. Sanctification is something that often gets confused with justification. Sanctification is a process that the Lord does in the life of a true follower of Jesus who is filled with His Spirit. All the ones perfecting themselves through their own "goodness" and own "abilities" will find themselves eventually on the wrong side of the spiritual war that is going on even now. 

Like faithful Lot we can pray with the Lord about these lost ones, but in the end, like with Lot, the decision rests with God. Does He transform them into the likeness of His being?..... or will they go on "perfecting themselves", still unrepentant, haughty, self-satisfied, hellbound....

  

Force Feeding a Cat

When I was first saved (a long, long time ago) I got the notion that it was my duty to now save EVERYONE. I talk about a dream that I had way back then on this blog post (toward the bottom of the post). About that time a young man told me that it was no good that I try to be the Holy Spirit for people, that I was trying to force people to "get it" and that doing so was like trying to force feed a cat.

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Yeah, something like that, and I can get almost that determined too. But a kitty (even one that is a more common housecat variety) would have to be pretty near starving to death to require that kind of intervention, however, I had somehow decided people didn't realize they were headed to hell (rightly) and that spiritually speaking they truly are starving to death and that this required immediate action on my part. Yes, yes, and no.

Fast forward to today... I've accepted that your normal garden-variety hateful and hate-filled atheist is going to hell, period. Well, true that the Lord can supernaturally intervene in that person's life like He did with Saul/Paul, but anyway, I realize that for me it would be a hopeless cause. And I also understand that those who have a hunger to understand (like the Ethiopian eunuch in Acts ch 8) the Lord will make sure someone will help out. But what about those who are starving, and so near dying of starvation, and who think they are "just fine"??? I surely need to give them some immediate and direct intervenous assistance to save them from what they are just too happy to suffer, and because they are mere inches from a fate worse than death down their "road of life"??? Surely God requires due diligence of me; someone who clearly sees what is going on here???

Well....again that would presuppose that the Lord doesn't have a handle on each person's individual situation, and He does, no matter how much they hate Him, or insist that they know more about Him than the average stupid Christian does, or what have you, He knows everything, He knows IT ALL! The imagery about us being His hands and His feet on earth is a nice story, and He does use us to do His will from time to time, but He doesn't always require it. Besides, the best thing we can do for others in spiritual dire straights is pray. We see Moses doing it for those wayward Israelites time and time again, some of those Israelites were beyond that "point of no return" and some learned the lesson from what they see happen to them...

Moses and Korah

Yeah, the situation with Korah got him into alot of trouble with God, for sure, and even though Moses tried to intervene, well, the rest of the people were pretty shaken up about it but I think God got through...

To summarize this: I still struggle with trying to force feed a cat, when instead I just need to stay steady on the course to finish the race the Lord set before me. If I were in a race, and I tried dragging unwilling "would-be participants" who really don't want to be in that race, dragging them kicking and screaming, is that really accomplishing ANYTHING? And yet I continually try to do just that.

Heb 12:1-3 (ESV)

Therefore, 
since we are surrounded
by so great a cloud of witnesses, 
let us also lay aside every weight, 
and sin 
which clings so closely, 
and let us run with endurance
the race that is set before us,   
looking to Jesus, 
the founder and perfecter of our faith, 
who for the joy that was set before him 
endured the cross, 
despising the shame, 
and is seated 
at the right hand of the throne of God.   
Consider him 
who endured from sinners

such hostility

against himself, 
so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted.


So true, and amen.

Maturity in Christ Part 4 - Merry Christmas

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I have an early memory of being given a  Christmas tree ornament as a very young child. I remember it still, we were headed out the door visiting someone my parents knew, and she handed me a bright red round and shiny Christmas ball ornament.

 I was delighted and straight away bit into it to everyone's horror, and I remember crying....

A couple of years ago I asked my mom about this incident. I asked if she remembered it, and if I had to go to the hospital for cuts to my lips and mouth. She said...

The Evil We See... and God's Love

Yesterday morning, just before waking I had this dream:

There are terrible creatures, hideous, somewhat reptile-like, somewhat human-like. They are destroying everything and everyone in their path. The people they encounter are torn apart, or squeezed to death, blood is everywhere. One looks right at me as I am looking at this terrible horrible scene. He rushes to me but I have a force field in front of me. He hits it really hard, and I can see a large crack in the shield but it remains firmly in place before me. He loses interest in me and continues killing and destroying in other directions, as I look passively on. I recognize that I am looking at all of this and have no feelings about it at all. I see death and mayhem and blood everywhere, and have no compassion, or sorrow. I see that even though I am not doing the killing, that I am no better than the demons that are doing the ruthless slaughter. I just like them, feel no love for those being senselessly slaughtered. I am cold and heartless....and then I awaken, and think about what I just dreamed...


What comes to mind first of all, is that this is truly happening in the realm of the spirit. Demons are seeking whom they can destroy, and they are having a field day, wreaking havoc on this fallen world. God protects His own, and the devil cannot touch them (me included)...but because I am not being hurt, I can be cold and unfeeling about the people who are being hurt, and destroyed, by the devil's very ill behaviour. Even though I could clearly see the perilousness of the situation, the disgusting, violent, and senseless destruction, I have no sense of pity or horror, UNTIL I think it is tainting me by making me look bad (just as evil as the demons) to not have the correct pity towards the afflicted. And this is true about me. I do not have enough of a sense of urgency for the lost and dying. I do not make use of what I know about Jesus to try to help those in the devil's clutches. God selects whomsoever He will, but He chooses to use His elect to reach others. But many of His elect are like me. We see the sin, the evil, and if it doesn't touch us directly...
 we can choose to watch....
or choose to look away....

...but how often do we choose in God's strength and through prayer, to intervene?

Zec 4:6  Then he said to me, "This is the word of the LORD to Zerubbabel: Not by might, nor by power, but by my Spirit, says the LORD of hosts.
Zec 4:7  Who are you, O great mountain? Before Zerubbabel you shall become a plain. And he shall bring forward the top stone amid shouts of 'Grace, grace to it!'"
Zec 4:8  Then the word of the LORD came to me, saying,
Zec 4:9  "The hands of Zerubbabel have laid the foundation of this house; his hands shall also complete it. Then you will know that the LORD of hosts has sent me to you.
Zec 4:10  For whoever has despised the day of small things shall rejoice, and shall see the plumb line in the hand of Zerubbabel. "These seven are the eyes of the LORD, which range through the whole earth."





I know that in my own strength and by my own ability I cannot accomplish anything worth anything in eternity...and then it is only (usually) to bring glory to myself for my heroic deeds. But in Christ I can do anything


Php 4:10  I rejoiced in the Lord greatly that now at length you have revived your concern for me. You were indeed concerned for me, but you had no opportunity.
Php 4:11  Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content.
Php 4:12  I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need.
Php 4:13  I can do all things through him who strengthens me.
Php 4:14  Yet it was kind of you to share my trouble. 

Perhaps it is partly because of "the spirit of the age" that I have become numbed to the horrors of what is going on today. I can simply turn off the television and then go on about my own business, and as long as I feel good about myself, everything is good. The rest of the world can "go to hell in a hand-basket" but if it doesn't touch me, why worry about it? It's going to happen anyway, right? Or should I still wrestle in the spirit about it, and pray for understanding, and strength and compassion to at least attempt to do some small thing for the Lord that might be used by Him to save a lost soul? Can I look on what is happening with compassion, angst, the love of Christ, instead of looking away so I can be "at peace"? So I can feel good about myself? What did Jesus do? If I do not feel for the lost, am I just as cold and unfeeling as the demons that are ripping the unsaved to shreds? Yes, I believe that I am just that cold and unfeeling, at times, and only by God's grace and His help is there any hope for me to reach his lost ones through me in this decaying and tormented world.


Philippians 4:13  I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

Yesterday Morning

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Dream:

I am very high up and have to cross a huge chasm by holding on to gymnastic rings and stepping onto swings that are swinging back and forth through the air. The first step is pretty easy. I gain confidence (in my own ability) and step onto the second swing as it comes towards me. So far, so good. The next swing seems to elude me. It's going a little faster than the previous ones. I cannot seem to get the timing on it. It slips past me as I try to get my feet in position. I notice that the way the seat is connected to the cords it is suspended from looks "iffy" (some baling wire of some sort is holding these steps to their suspension cords). My arms are getting tired. I realize that I'm dreaming and to escape this torture all I have to do is wake up...so I awaken...


I tell my husband about the dream, and he says "Too much Cirque du Soleil for you!" Well, yes, we saw the Cirque du Soleil movie just a few nights before (and enjoyed it very much!), so I'm sure that was a part of the reason for dreaming this dream....but when I first awoke, it had me thinking about faith, and about stepping out in faith in this life...and about trusting in my own ability and strength...and where were those rings and swings connected??? What or Who was supporting my walk through the air??? Was it "nothing"? Or was it SomeOne?

Do Dreams Mean Anything? Part 3

 Pro 18:11  The rich man's wealth is his strong city, and as an high wall in his own conceit.

Pro 18:12  Before destruction the heart of man is haughty, and before honour is humility.

Yesterday morning I wrestled in a dream that when I awoke had me thinking about a girl at work that had "visited" me in my dream. Let's call her Sarah....a bit of background info on Sarah: she is a young lady of about 21 years of age. She is a smart, and pretty little red head. The expression on her face is usually blank, but with her mouth turned downward giving her an angry expression. When she does laugh, it is a bitter sort, haughty and cynical, and soon after that moment passes, she reverts back to the blank and angry stare. Her attitude and actions say "I really don't give a $#I+ about you, or about anything, so let's just get on with it".

The dream:

Sarah smirked about my faith in Jesus and made snide remarks about my age affecting my ability to reason. I said "I can hardly wait to see YOU when you are 60 (I'm not 60, but getting close), and see how you handle it" to which she coldly and calmly countered "And YOU won't be around to see it"....I then grabbed her by the shoulders and drew her right up to my face and said: "Jesus REALLY IS true and real, there IS a God, and that is the TRUTH!"  She didn't budge, and while my face was in hers says coldly "You are not getting through to my heart". I let her go but while doing so said haughtily "That's too bad, I feel SORRY for you". In the dream I caught a glimpse of a coworker (who says he's an atheist, but I do not get that "vibe" from him at all) and he's trying to get my attention with a look of sad disapproval in how I'm behaving.

When I awoke I kept thinking about my reaction (which is pretty accurate of how I am, unfortunately) and about Sarah, about how she is at work, and about what took place in my dream.

In part, this is what I've come up with so far (it needs alot of unpacking):

1. Sarah has a huge guard up. She's a tiny thing barely 5 feet (I think... if that) and has a huge wall that says "You cannot hurt me because I'm inside my huge fortress". Her attitude, ideas, frame of reference, etc, all are part of the fortress that "protects" her, giving her an appearance of strength and invulnerability.

2. Sarah is young, and has a cockiness toward everyone that says "I'm better than you are...get used to it" and I have a problem with that kind of attitude, always have...especially with someone as young and impertinent as that. Now they call that sort of thing "precocious". I just think it's terribly bad manners.

3. My approach (exaggerated, however right on target in this dream) is to drill the truth into people. "Jesus is Lord, like it or lump it!!! Too bad for you if you are so retarded you can't accept the fact" Yeah, that's how I think, even if I don't express it in words to people, it's there just under the surface. :-(

4. Sarah is somewhere inside there, and I think she's hurting and afraid to let it show, and actions and attitudes such as mine drive her deeper and make her more sure that keeping that guard way high is the right thing to do especially around Christian fanatics.

5. Yes, God does not like haughtiness, therefore for me to counter what I perceive as haughtiness with haughtiness of my own is doubly wrong. Two wrongs definitely don't make a right. :-(

There's alot more there, but that is the main thrust of it.

When I was a newborn Christian, I had a dream that went like this:

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I saw a parade of men in business suits and ties, dress shoes polished, and brief cases in their right hand, jogging in formation, all looking straight ahead with no expression, like robots. I wondered about them...and then saw a beautiful young woman who looked wise beyond her seemingly young appearance...so I asked her "Who are they, and what are they about?" She pointed in the direction they were running and said "Look and see" so I walked a few steps their direction and saw up ahead beautiful suburbs and quiet streets and homes, all identical, row after row. Their whole purpose and goal was that life here that lay in front of them.... and I called out to them "but there's so much more!!!" but they didn't hear me, they continued stone-faced in lock step "trudge-trudging" ahead in their lock step jog.  I looked at the young woman and asked "how do I get through?" and she pointed at me...but it wasn't at me, she was pointing to someone behind me. There was a girl that was crying, deeply hurt. I asked her what was wrong and how I could help her. She immediately stopped crying and told me she wanted a sandwich.

At the time I had that dream, I was unsure about evangelism and what my role needed to be in it. This dream helped me to understand what part of the problem (for me, anyway) is. People have their hearts and minds set to the things of this world, not realizing that this world is passing away...and that our lives are very short when compared to eternity. Getting people to think about it is.....hard, if not impossible, if they don't want to. The young and hurting girl in the dream seemed to be telling me that I stand a better chance at reaching the hurting, and yet still they will try to make their hunger only about immediate gratification, when of course, the hunger goes much deeper than the immediate.

Both of these dreams have a common thread. They both are about reaching others, and about my natural inclinations of how to do it, and how off the mark my natural reactions and inclinations are, even when it is well intentioned (most often my ways don't even reach that high...but even that "well meaning" high reach isn't high enough).

This world is lost. The people are blind, deaf and dumb, like the jogging businessmen. My noise of "clanging cymbals" will only make them want to run away from me. It doesn't work. What did the Apostle Paul say about how to reach others?

Col 4:3  Withal praying also for us, that God would open unto us a door of utterance, to speak the mystery of Christ, for which I am also in bonds:

Col 4:4  That I may make it manifest, as I ought to speak.

Col 4:5  Walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time.

Col 4:6  Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.

In all things, seeking the Lord in prayer for openings (for God to soften their heart and make them open and receptive), for wisdom, for endurance through adversity when we are met with ridicule and hostility, and in everything, with grace and love, giving thanks to our Heavenly Father who supplies us with the gifts that are truly appropriate to each moment, and not dependent on our fleshy ways to achieve anything for Him.

The area of God's sovereignty comes into this in a way that is beyond my limitations of how to understand it. He has provided a means to alter what "is", by using us to reach others, when we get ourselves out of His way to do it through us. I've seen the sovereignty issue ignored and/or abused, because it causes Christians to think they don't need to do anything, God is doing it and what I do won't change what He has purposed...yes, AND no. There is an interactive element to His dealings with us, one that causes us to submit to His sovereign will because of His doing, not ours, and yet WE CAN get in the way and impede progress, hardening ourselves, like young Sarah has hardened herself. What I see in Sarah, is also true about myself.

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Smile or Die....

This is actually a continuation of the previous two posts. Just saw this on Astexan's blog... and it is again bringing up the issues and nailing the things that I experienced in that weird dream. The following video clip is very insightful, but you will see that he is obviously not a Christian, and I do not agree with his conclusion. He is an excellent cartoonist! I wish I could draw like that! He explains how mean and callous it is to force people to "think positive". Notice the subtle difference between being forced to think positive with negative consequences like being fired for not complying, compared with having faith and trusting God truly, not having a care because God really does care for you....anyway, it is a subtle and crafty....and yet glaring difference (for those whom the Lord gives wisdom and the eyes to see the difference), and yet the visible church (as opposed to the elect, whose calling is known in the spirit, by God) is picking up the  mantra of the forced positive happy faced thinking to bring "health and wealth" to their audiences.

Anyway, this is about 10 mins long:

The artist in this video is a gentleman, but the speaker is Barbara Ehrenreich...

Barbara Ehrenreich has a blog:

 http://ehrenreich.blogs.com/

  and has written a few books:

http://www.barbaraehrenreich.com/

Do Dreams Mean Anything? Part 2

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Ok, this is just....too coincidental, that I would be drawn to read about this on Velvet's blog... I read the vigilant citizen article many months ago, but what Velvet said about influences and  spiritual warfare is EXACTLY what my dream was saying to me in my spirit...that there are spiritual forces at work seducing us and manipulating us through fearing the consequences if we don't go along with their agenda! I know some of us don't fall for it...but many are falling for it...and I have to humbly admit that I did fall for it for many years, giving in to what deep down I knew was wrong, so the "cool people" would also think that I was one of them. That is exactly it, what I tried (and kinda couldn't find the right words) to say yesterday.  What the dream was about was all this junk, the abortion/murder industry, the homosexual perversion agenda, and ecumenical stuff about everyone banding together on the "love train" which is anything but loving...it is sinister, it is evil, it is hardening people and making them more and more hateful and prideful and against anything holy and pure....it is poisoning people's spirits by choosing to take the easy way out of wanting to "get along" with the majority, with the "cool people" and not wanting to appear to be a nerd, or worse, an ignorant fool (that "they" want to paint born again Christians to be). Out of that fear many just join up with the evil agendas, so they won't look stupid....joining with the stupid so they themselves won't look stupid... Everyone is joining everyone else by saying "Yes, don't the emperor's clothes look marvelous" because they don't want to be different and dumb-looking by pointing out the obvious...the emperor is NAKED, and blind and dumb....and oh so wrong!!! If I say it, I will be different, and will look funny to others, and they will call me names and think I'm stupid....vanity.

So what if they think I'm stupid, if they are the ones that have given in to stupidity such as that?

Do Dreams Mean Anything?

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I tried to find an image that showed the feeling that I felt and this is about the closest I could come to it...it was as if everyone around me was in compliance and I was the only one who wasn't going along, and they all wanted to force me to be like them.

I had a really weird dream this morning around 3:30 am...and it made me really wonder if they mean anything? I know that dreams are mentioned in the OT, and the Apostle Paul mentioned something about:

2Co 12:2  I knew a man in Christ above fourteen years ago, (whether in the body, I cannot tell; or whether out of the body, I cannot tell: God knoweth;) such an one caught up to the third heaven. 

...and the Apostle John said:

Rev 1:10  I was in the Spirit on the Lord's day, and heard behind me a great voice, as of a trumpet

Not that I'm trying to compare myself with those Bible greats, I'm just wondering and trying to figure this out...anyway, the dream I had was very difficult...that's not the right word, but I cannot find a word to describe it... It was so realistic. I was caught in a situation where everyone tried to force me to do the things they wanted me to do, and if I didn't choose what they wanted, they did something (I don't recall exactly what anymore) that caused me excruciating pain to the point of death. I remember feeling scared, but not giving in, and there were two men that wanted to "help" me by saying they would work with me if I "acted like" I agreed with the ugly circumstances, they would give me a pass and not torment me. Then I woke up.

When I awoke I thought about what I had just dreamed for about 15-20 minutes before falling back asleep. It was very unsettling, a heaviness on me. I kept thinking how real it was, and that it is really happening in the spirit world, that something is going on just under our conscious radar, but that it involves our spirits. Does that make any sense? I hope others can help me to understand this a little better. Anyone else having these kinds of thoughts and dreams?